Whatever Happened To Slade

UK, London, March 21st, 1977 - LP

"It was always reported at the time that the title was taken from Putney bridge which had it emblazoned on one side. 'Whatever Happened To Slade' was certainly daubed on the wall of the Oval"
Dave Graham: Slade In England
At the beginning of chapter 10 in Holders book, he states quite categorically.
"While we were away in the states, someone had written Whatever Happened To Slade in huge letters across one of the sides of a Thames bridge, it was a famous piece of graffiti, it was there for years, we went to see it, we loved it...we had recorded a second album in New York and was due for release, we wanted to call it  Whatever Happened To Slade and use a shot of the bridge on the sleeve. The record company liked the title, but not the cover idea..."

"It was oft reported that Chandler had named the bands 1977 LP after seeing graffiti on a bridge in Londinium, and that the graffiti was in some way connected to fans of the band... now that may or may not be true, it's a good story but the reference to the band is completely wrong. The first recorded grafitti with the subject matter was an act of vandalism perpetrated against that most August of English Establishment iconography the Wall of the Kensington Oval Cricket Ground. This was in common usage as a pre cursor to drop in front of anything in those days and it all stemmed from the name of a popular TV comedy show 'Whatever Happened To The Likely Lads'."

"There was an argument put forward that the six foot high graffiti on the walls of the Oval were in actual fact a reference made to a court case and legal battle being presided over by lord Chief Justice Sir Christopher Slade, a court case that was threatening to tear the game of cricket apart as Australian business man Kerry Packer set about reinventing the game and started offering Big big money for professional players, England players at that, to go off to Play Australian Cricket, The ECCB (English County Cricket Board) decided that this was an outrageous proposition and banned any of it's members from playing for Kerry Packer. Justice Slade by and large came down on the side of Packer and his rebel test matches, stating that "A professional cricketer needs to make his living as much as any other professional man.". This was widely seen as heresy by the Cricketing establishment, and brought into question the motives and otherwise impeccable credentials of Justice Slade, with mutterings and murmerings that he had somehow been bought by Packer, hence the sarcasm laden question 'Whatever Happened To Slade' which was hand painted in six foot high letters on the perimeter wall of the arena opposite the junction with Clayton Street. This graffiti also appeared in other places around London at the same time and remember that in the mid 70's graffiti protests had become fashionable after the 'George Davis is innocent' graffiti campaign where that particular graffiti was also carved out of Lords Test Cricket wicket."
"That story was perpetuated on a number of Slade related sites some years ago, and the internet being what it is, it soon became bandied around as a fact, especially on a certain Belgian based bored. It was all too easy to read up on the findings of Lord Chief Justice Sir Christopher Slade's ruling which actually took place in 1978. The legal case began in late september of 1977 and indeed WHTS was daubed on the Oval walls and made the press as ruffled retired colonels from Surrey wrote letters of complaint to the Times. However, as WHTS was released in Mar/Apr of 77, a full six months before Justice Slade started the case it would make the postulation complete and utter cobblers, which it was. WHTS was being daubed around London probably by the same fan a good two years before the events of the cricketing summer of 1977. This was of course before their re emergence on the UK tour circuit in 1977."
Barn Records - 2314 103

The seventh Studio Album by the band and the first on their own label, Barn, but it did not enter any national album chart, so "Whatever Happened" indeed?














Europe, 2007
Salvo - SALVOCD006

The 2007 Salvo Remastered CD Reissue contained a whole batch of Bonus Tracks!








My thanks to Chris 'The Historian' Selby for his relentless research. It is said, in certain circles, that Walsall Archives have a seat reserved specifically for him and that Wolverhampton archives consult him when searching the Express & Star


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Be
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

Be helpful to the shyman,
But be careful of the slyman oh baby,
Be guidance to the blindman,
And be thankful to the kind man oh baby,
Be scintillating, aggravating, penetrating, over rating,
Baby don't you know,
Be hostess with the mostest to
Whoever comes the closest,
Oh baby don't you know.
Be faithful to the true man,
Sympathetic to the blue man oh baby,
Be dwarf against the tall man oh baby,
Be a giant against the small man oh baby.
Be scrutinizing, tantalizing, appetizing, full moon-rising,
Baby don't you know,
Be mistress with a history of mystery and twistery,
Oh baby don't you know.

[Chorus]
Stand up, stand up, stand up and be yourself,
Stand up, stand up, don't be nobody else,
'Cos me well you see, I don't need nobody else.

Be beauty for the plain man,
But be sane for the insane man,
Oh baby don't you know,
Be dirty for the clean man,
But be shirty for the obscene man
Oh baby don't you know
Be understanding, undemanding, hand in hand happy landing,
Baby don't you know,
Be harem, scarem, grin and bare 'em,
Wash and wear 'em, do or dare 'em,
Oh baby don't you know.

[Chorus Repeat]

Be beauty for the plain man,
And be sane for the insane man,
And be faithful to the true man,
Sympathetic to the blue man,
Oh baby don't you know,
Be helpful to the shyman, and be wary of the slyman
Be guidance to the blindman, and be thankful to the kindman,
Oh baby don't you know,
Be mistress with a history of mystery and twistery,
Oh baby don't you know,
Be hostess with the mostest to whoever comes the closest,
Oh baby don't you know.

[Chorus Repeat]

Stand up, stand up, stand up....
'Cos me, well you see
I'll never find nobody else....
'Cos me, well you see
I'll never find nobody else,
I'll never find nobody else,
I'll never find nobody else,
Like you - no no.


Lightning  Never Strikes Twice
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

Lightning never strikes twice lightning never strikes twice
Lightning never strikes me twice in one place
From an electric cloud to an electric cloud
Lighning take me for a ride into space

Saw a fast fallen star I saw a fast fallen star
Saw the twisted candle melting aways
Heard a rooster crow I heard a new day grow
Saw a sign that said way out in a maze

Who did slip me de fin - I don't know where to begin to come down
Who did slip me de trip - It ain't hip I need a grip or I'll drown

From an eternity to an eternity I crossed the universe and wanted to stay
Passed through infinite time I passed through infinite time, saw creation from the opposite way

Who did slip me de fin - I don't know where to begin to come down
Who did slip me de trip - It ain't hip I need a grip or I'll drown

Lightning never strikes twice lightning never strikes twice
Lightning never strikes me twice in one place
And I drove in my car to catch a fast rising star
Many who are gonna sink without trace

Heard a rooster crow heard a new day grow
Saw the sign that said way out in a maze
From an eternity to an eternity
I was born again but still in a daze

Who did slip me de fin - I don't know where to begin to come down
Who did slip me de trip - It ain't hip I need a grip or I'll drown

Who did slip me de fin - I don't know where to begin to come down
Who did slip me de trip - It ain't hip I need a grip or I'll drown

Yeah Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah


Dogs Of Vengeance
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

They'll chase you, they'll race you
They'll run you to the ground, them dogs of vengeance on the prowl
They'll haunt you, they'll taunt you, they won't make a sound
Mark well the trickery dogs that don't howl
They'll psych you, they'll strike you, they're hot on your heels
Them dogs of vengeance are unreal
They'll track you, they'll crack you, they'll melt nerves of steel
Some sad obituary you are the meal
So come to my castle you innocent souls, some good entertainment I've planned
Come to my chamber and I will unfold some exquisite passion so grand
Some torment the best in the land
They'll hound you, then surround you, then get set to attack
Them dogs of vengeance on the prowl
They'll claw you, then tug-a-war you, there'll be no turning back
Accept my sanctuary, throw in the towel
So come to my castle you innocent souls
Some good entertainment I've planned
Come to my chamber and I will unfold
Some exquisite passion so grand
Some torment the best in the land
Some exquisite passion so grand
Some torment the best in the land
Some good entertainment I've planned
Them dogs are still hot on your heels
Them dogs gonna melt nerves of steel
Them dogs gonna make you the meal


When Fantasy Calls
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

Juicy fruit - Cock-a hoot - You're comin' on strong - You're comin' on strong
Not so fast - Make it last - The feeling takes time - It's yours and it's mine

Oh when fantasy calls it takes all the balls you possess
Oh them houses of pleasure - where can I find this address

What's in store? Thrills galore - You're turning me on - You're turning me on
Slip and slide - Open wide - The feeling's so good, just like it should

Oh when fantasy calls, it takes all the balls you possess
And them houses of pleasure - Where can I find this address?

Oh when fantasy calls, it takes all the balls you possess
And them houses of pleasure - Where can I find this address?


One Eyed Jacks With Moustaches
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

Rawwwwk!
One Eyed Jacks With Moustaches are wild one the side
Two eyed queens makin' passes with childs on the side
Hard hearted Mamas who ain't cold as ice on the side

Bald headed eagles like to feather their nests on the side
Wide eyed Madonnas like to treasure their chests on the side
Smooth talking Gigolos are going along for the ride

Hit me, hit me, hit me Mac - Gimme the jack before I pack
Hit me, hit me, hit me Joe - Gimme the hit before I go

I'm gonna tell ya pretty Mama that you don't know no lie
I'm gonna tell ya pretty baby that you won't make me cry
Umma gumma uma uma make me feel good
Ooh pretty baby baby just like you should
Come a come a baby don't you tell me no lie
Come a come a honey honey don't you make me cry
The hard hearted Mamas are sure on the side
And One Eyed Jacks With Moustaches are wild

One Eyed Jacks With Moustaches are wild on the side
Two eyed queens with eyelashes that flashes and cried
Hard hearted Mamas who talk to you nice on the ride

Hit me, hit me, hit me Mac - Gimme the jack before I pack
Hit me, hit me, hit me Joe - Gimme the hit before I go


Big Apple Blues
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

City streets where the steam and the heat never goes to sleep
What a sight all the yellow and tans and the blacks and whites
There's also a dark shade of blue struttin' along two by two
Their guns hangin' low like the cowboys you dig in the old gunfights

But still I got hooked on them big apple blues
And I got hung up on them big apple blues
And I got strung up on them big apple blues
I ain't got nothint' to lose

Them hot licks from the hicks satisfy the Manhattan chicks
Them cool schmucks get their hooks on the bucks with their sexy looks
They all know how to do what good little girls shouldn't do
I don't care 'bout evasion 'cos all o' that hassle sucks

But still I got hooked on them big apple blues
And I got hung up on them big apple blues
And I got strung up on them big apple blues
I ain't got nothin' to lose

I got turned on - I got turned on -
I got turned on - I got turned on
I got turned on - I got turned on -
I got turned on - I got turned on
I got turned on - I got hooked on -
I got switched on - I got turned on
I got turned on - I got hooked on -
I got switched on - I got turned on yeah

City streets where the steam and the heat never goes to sleep
And city walls standing tall if you fall no-one hears you call
There are bodies all filled up with wine sayin' buddy have you got a dime
The apple ain't bad it's just bruised and I'm glad that it's there at all

But still I got hooked on them big apple blues
And I got hung up on them big apple blues
I got strung on switched on hooked on them big apple blues
I got hooked on snooked on cooked on them big apple blues

Why I got to hang on to hang on to hang on to hang on to them blues
Why I got hooked on cooked on snooked on them big apple blues
And I got hooked on them big apple blues
I ain't got nothin' to lose


Dead Men Tell No Tales
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

On the day we pulled the bank job, Mugsy Baker he stopped some lead
He don't always pack the hardware but we sure did need the bread
Everything was running smoothly all the folks were cool and calm
Till some smartass became the hero and then he sounded the alarm

Dead men don't tell no tales no deceit no betrayals
Their only time time time is fading away
Dead men don't tell no lies they don't need no alibis
Their only time time time is wasting away

Soon the building was surrounded, not a chance to make a break
We was trapped the cops were closin' in them bullets were no fake
As the good guy he lay there bleedin' Me the bad guy I started to retch
Then old Mugsy he caught a ricochet We were heading for a stretch

Dead men don't tell no tales no deceit no betrayals
Their only time time time is fading away
Dead men don't tell no lies they don't need no alibis
Their only time time time is wasting away

In the holdup there was Mugsy, Me and Benjamin the bear
Mugs would rather go down fightin' Just to save him from the chair

Dead men don't tell no tales no deceit no betrayals
Their only time time time is fading away
Dead men don't tell no lies they don't need no alibis
Their only time time time is wasting away


She's Got The Lot
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

That painted lady - That satin doll
That lazy shady walk that makes her look like a moll
Dressed up in diamonds - She won't take no less
Guess someone must have poured her into that dress

She's got the lot what she's got's all her own
She's got so much that she can leave some at home
She won't come in unless she knows she's invited
Her feel her smell her touch just gets me oh so excited

That wild aroma - Paris perfume
It just takes over when she walks in the room
Won't get neglected - She don't get no chance
Don't feel rejected if she refuses to dance

She's got the lot and what she's got's all her own
She's got so much that she can leave some at home
She won't come in unless she knows she's invited
Her feel her smell her touch just gets me oh so excited

That chic cheeky lady - She's gonna get what she picks
She can wear you out and she can milk you dry with them tricks
That wiley styley lady with sophisticated quips
She can eat you up and she can spit you out with them lips

She's got the lot and what she's got's all her own
She's got so much that she can leave some at home
She won't come in unless she knows she's invited
Her feel her smell her touch just gets me oh so excited


It Ain't Love But It Ain't Bad
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

Backstage rendezvous are healthy
They realise they're ain't for keeps ooh
Nitty gritty recreation
I have to go without some sleep

Ooh ooh it ain't love but ooh ooh it ain't bad
Some of them one night stands ooh ooh that I've had
Keepin' me happy all the time I'm on my own
Keepin' me satisfied when I'm away from home

Backdoor ladies so persuasive
How they work to take you in ooh ooh
They guarantee you sheer exhaustion
They notify my next of kin

Ooh ooh it ain't love but ooh ooh it ain't bad
Some of them one night stands ooh ooh that I've had
Keepin' me happy all the time I'm on my own
Keepin' me satisfied when I'm away from home

Hail the rock 'n' rollin' backbone
'Cos bigger names they're out to win ooh
No complication or frustration
They don't keep you sane but they keep you thin

Ooh ooh it ain't love but ooh ooh it ain't bad
Some of them one night stands ooh ooh that I've had
Keepin' me happy all the time I'm on my own
Keepin' me satisfied when I'm away from home

Ooh ooh it ain't love ooh ooh it ain't bad
Ooh ooh it ain't love ooh ooh it ain't bad
Ooh ooh it ain't love ooh ooh it ain't bad
Ooh ooh it ain't love


The Soul, The Roll And The Motion
(Noddy Holder & Jimmy Lea)

Oh you can call me the joker
And you can call me the king of the bounce
Well you can call me the jumper
And you can call me the king of the pounce

It's the soul and the roll and the motion
It's the strength and the length and the notion

Well the first time I saw you I just couldn't ignore you
And I wanted you right there and then yeah
The first time we tried it I got right there inside it
We did it all over and then all over again

Oh you can call me the leaper
And you can call me the king of the stroke
Well call me the leaper
'Cos I'm the love king with plenty of poke

It's the soul and the roll and the motion
It's the strength and the length and the notion

Well the first time we made it your reaction okay'd it
And I wanted you down to the ground yeah
The two of us knew it that if sometime we blew it
We'd get it together yeah the next time around

Everybody call me get lucky
You can call me the get lucky king
Oh oh oh call me get lucky
You can call me the bee with the sting

It's the soul and the roll and the motion
It's the strength and the length and the notion

Well the first time I saw you I just couldn't ignore you
And I needed you down to the ground yeah
The two of us knew it that if sometime we blew it
We'd get it - next time around

I said call me the jumper
'Cos I keep coming back for some more
Oh oh oh call me the jumper
And I'm the get lucky king that's for sure

It's the soul and the roll and the motion
It's the strength and the length and the notion
It's the soul and the roll and the strength, the length

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